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21st century digital girl

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What are journals good for? Guilt. [Aug. 20th, 2010|04:39 pm]
21st century digital girl
So, I might have just insulted our transgendered employee over the phone accidentally and I feel so bad about it, I'm going to update my livejournal. I know we have a transgendered employee because people "warned" me about her when I started working here. I guess it's good not to be surprised, even if you have PC liberal leanings. Anyway, I haven't worked with her and I didn't ask her name or try to look for her so I could get huffy that she could be using the same bathroom as me.

But today I unwittingly called her on the phone about a visitor and she sounded counfused and I mistook the confusion as "Listen, front-desk-girl, I am a dude who is sensative about his girly voice, I am NOT the lady you were trying to call!" so I apologized and said I was trying to get ahold of (Girl's name) before it dawned on me that maybe she was the girl I'd heard about and I might have just implied that SHE was not the lady she claimed to be. I fumbled and we hung up fast.

I imagine it’s real frustrating when you think you’re making progress and getting closer to your goals (She looks very nice, but I don't think she's fully in transition yet.)and then somebody on the phone who isn’t biased by seeing you or having known you pre-goal makes an assumption like that.

It’s hard enough figuring out what it means to be a woman, and how to get femininity down without seeming like a child or loosing the respect of other people when you’re born a girl, I can’t even imagine how crazy it is to undertake that when you start with a disadvantage. Girls are pretty hard on themselves as it is.

I guess stuff like that is a good gauge for her to know how far along she is in the process, really, though. I imagine over-supportive friends pretending you’ve always been a girl and you look perfect when you don’t feel like you’re supposed to yet is just as frustrating as people who keep calling you “Carl” instead of “Carla” after a while. At least that is what I’m going to tell myself. That she could tell my mistake was an innocent one, and that she chalked it up to an experience that will make her better and help her forge her identity.
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These flapjacks are made of love. [Feb. 10th, 2010|04:44 pm]
21st century digital girl
Is it cold where you are? Are you hungry? lionhearts  posted a killer cornbread recipe and asked what all of her readers were obsessed with making these days. This is my reply:
Banana Nut Pancakes!Collapse )
Coming soon: Garlic Mashed Potato Pizza. Yes, really.
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How I spent my birthday [Jan. 25th, 2010|09:19 pm]
21st century digital girl
 By Megan, age 25.

Singing. Belgian waffles, cupcakes, coffee. More singing. Chocolate covered fruit basket! Messages from all over. Staying late at work doing tedious paper stacking. Nap. Singing again. Giant box from my mom. (One sexy secretary dress, one bafflingly long shirt.) Burnt plastic all over our pizza stone, filled kitchen with smoke. Decided long shirt was good for pajamas, housepainting, risky business dance. Got stuck in very tight sexy secretary dress and had to get help out of it. More songs and messages. Garlic mashed potato pizza for dinner on real tablecloth at real table. Wine glass filled with sparkling energy beverage instead of wine, though. Stupid ferret decided to investigate romantic fireplace candles and singed all the whiskers on the right side of his face off. The end?
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Feel the Love [Jan. 18th, 2010|11:21 pm]
21st century digital girl
[music |Cut Copy - Lights & Music]

I'm about to turn 25, and I am so underwhelmed by it all. It's a big depressing or exciting milestone for young people to get through, right? Most birthdays, I don't feel profoundly different. I got pretty weird last year, I guess, but I was under all kinds of stress and that's enough to make anyone feel their mortality. 

Honestly, 2010 feels the exact opposite of 2009 so far and I couldn't be gladder.
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Something something blues. [Dec. 30th, 2009|12:39 pm]
21st century digital girl
Can I just take a moment to brag? I just watched my mom successfully put her itunes giftcard into her computer and download some lady gaga and pink, which she added to a playlist for work. She then plugged it into some speakers and started playing it for us. Highfive, mom!
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(no subject) [Dec. 26th, 2009|08:50 pm]
21st century digital girl
Hello! Have you been traveling this holiday? I have. Did you hear about the guy who tried to blow up the plane in Detroit? I was there not 15 minutes before they landed. My flight was delayed, and if we had waited any longer, we might have been there during all the crazy aftermath. Everything worked out okay, though! 
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Er, it's me again. [Dec. 22nd, 2009|12:37 pm]
21st century digital girl
Oh livejournal, it looks like I’ve abandoned you. I’ve got the depression again, which isn’t much worth typing about. And I’ve been having major anxiety when I try to write, anyway, which is probably just a side effect. Seriously, I stare at blank text boxes for hours trying to respond to a simple e-mail from my grandma. And I don’t call anyone to check in, or make plans for the weekend, or tell my boyfriend how I’m having crazy nightmares and waking up at three in the morning everynight unless I’m STRONGLY prompted to. I’ve done some cleaning this week, though, and I think that there is so much thinking built up at this point that the floodgates might open at any moment if I just start typing.

 I’m still hovering around reading you, if that counts for anything without comments. Everybody’s lives are so exciting these days! Asking hot people out and totally getting their numbers, going to amazing concerts, getting awesome jobs, ingesting weird stuff, being happy about new boyfriends…you guys are ending the year with style! Of course, I’ve seen some sad stuff, too, but mostly neat things.

Uh, so, other than having some sort of writer’s block and sleeping a lot I guess things are going pretty well for me. I’m about to start being a full time employee at work. I can get overtime and have health insurance and I get a little office of my own to work in for the afternoon. I actually beat a video game, and completed an adorable knitting project, and successfully made lemoncello and arancello, (Citrus infused vodka! Oh my gods!) so my life is not all failure and unfinished business! I am certainly not unhappy, just really hard on myself. I’ve been playing well in my D&D groups, I am kind of proud to have learned a new kind of game.

Here is a horrible story from Thanksgiving, so this is not just a lame update.Collapse )

Short version: I laughed at a person with a handicap when they fell out of their chair on the sidewalk next to me and it was the highlight of my thanksgiving.

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The bird and the worm [Sep. 15th, 2009|02:51 pm]
21st century digital girl
Okay, so I know it's lame and cliche, but I'm going to do what everyone else I know who's just thrown a wedding did and whine about how I feel stressed because I feel like I've got nothing done and I'm way behind and super intimidated by the people I have to work with because I'm doing it all myself. (Even though tons of people have genuinly offered to help me.)

But seriously guys, The Boy and I throw theme parties all the time. They go off swimmingly without a hitch. They look good. People participate and have a good time. I don't understand why I can't just make this one work like the rest.  Other than it is just the most people I have ever had to wrangle, ever, and also the hugest budget I've ever had to blow, even if the "average" bride drops as much on her dress alone.

We've finally got the place down at least. A really mod theater/recording studio down in Birmingham. It's been hard to sell to the grown-ups, but they aren't paying so they've just had to (rock&) roll with it. Most of the presexisting decoration is lighting and fabric.

I'm worried that nobody we know really dances, so I'm trying to come up with ways to make the reception really interactive, and less boring. 

We're DJing ourselves with a laptop and special premade playlists, hopefully with a home-made jukebox GUI that will alllow people to browse the preloaded music and request something to be inserted. (This will also prevent people from requesting total crap, and from having things snuck in that I never want to hear, such as that one Aerosmith song everybody and thier mom plays for slow dance time. Fuck that, we're slow dancing to Eels or The Cure or something!) I'm toying with the idea of giving DJbot3000 a break and having a band, too. A band made up of guitar hero players and a projector. If people won't dance, maybe they'd like to play?

I think the favors are going to be customized card games on all the tables, and I want the guest book to be made up of  "comment cards" with questions and blanks and maybe space for them to draw a picture with crayons, possibly also on the tables. I also want the program to have a tear out page with paper airplane fold lines. maybe we can as for the guests to write a wish for us on them and throw them up at the part where we run out of the ceremony. Do you think I am going to lose an eye? 

I think we're also maybe having serving stations serving weird interactive food, like pad thai so people will be involved in thier dinners.

I'm about to send an e-mail to a photographer I like to see if she'd be willing to help me rig up some sort of digital photobooth type area. Finding a way to have a "photobooth" is, like, my hugest pet project/the holy grail of things that we could have.

Does it sound like I'm on the right track? Have I lost focus? How am I going to get this all done? Actually I feel better having written it all out. This is alot to have going on during a five-hour party. I would have a good time at this hypothetical party. In fact, I want to attend it. 

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Hello. STOP Can you read this? STOP [Sep. 3rd, 2009|04:18 pm]
21st century digital girl
 Do you follow Joey Comeau’s twitter? He linked an article the other day about youth literacy I thought was not all that interesting when I first read it, but in retrospect was pretty astonishing. I think it was Stanford Professor studying how all this electronic communication effects how young people write. You know, looking into that “Twitter is killing the paragraph! Texting is ruining grammar! Bah!” stuff.

 She went through the bits about how much more expressive kids are with their language, and how they’re actually pretty good with grammar and that they actually read and write quite a bit what with all their status updates and IMs and blogs and everything. All that wasn’t very surprising to a participant. You people are NOT devolving into Neanderthals of language, grunting “blog.” and using blunt (direct) objects. Most of you make me look like a pre-schooler, actually.

 What got me was her point about older generations. Young people, she said, do tons of extra-curricular writing to argue points and review things and such and they share that writing, so they get tons of peer feedback and get very good at adapting their writing for their audience. But after they got out of school, most old folks never had to write a paragraph again unless they were in very specific fields. Maybe they’d write a letter or something but for the most part, they’re totally unpracticed in communicating through text. Wow, just wow.

 I always think about older people valuing books and READING things. They’re the ones who actually consume newspapers, for instance. They look at signs. They write and send real physical mail. Old people are literacy kings! Back when they were in school they did hardcore stuff like sentence diagrams and writing papers without spellcheckers and memorization. I couldn’t cut it in that world at all. And they’re always rightfully smug about having worked in those conditions.

 It never occurred to me that it didn’t work that way. Reading does not necessarily magically improve your writing. Writing improves your writing! And you have to do a ton of it to evolve. Much of the writing old people are seeing on the internets is their own. And they’re bad at it! Have you ever received a well written, expressive e-mail from a person over 60? They make PILES of grammar errors. (Admittedly, I think that’s partially because their eyes are going bad and they can’t see things like periods very well. And also arthritis must make typing hard, especially if you’re all QWERTY style typewriter stance.) They use harsh, simple sentence structures that make them sound angry all the time. Everything is formatted funny so it looks like a telegraph. It’s awkward as hell. It nevr occured to me that it wasn't just a crippling fear of technology, I guess.

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Being Ryan North [Jul. 22nd, 2009|02:25 pm]
21st century digital girl

We're having a last minute party at my house today.Making this invitation is pretty what I did all afternoon instead of cleaning. It sure made Brent happy and he is at work so that is hard to do. Maybe it will make you smile too? It must be awesome to be Ryan North. I'd like to jump into his head for five minutes as many times as possible. If I manage to take over, though, I promise to not make many changes...except to make out with Joey Comeau.  
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